After reading numerous quotes on “don’t be afraid to fail or don’t be afraid of failure,” for example, “don’t be afraid to fail, be afraid not to try,” and “failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.” Lastly, if you are afraid to fail, you’ll never succeed.
However, I’m reminded of how we (teachers, parents, and society as a whole) groom kids to be afraid of failure.
Kids go to school from kindergarten through 12th grade to get good grades and take standardized tests.
Therefore, if the kid gets straight A’s and one B, in some cases, they are looked at as if they did not try hard enough. You should have made straight A’s. “What’s wrong with you? Why are you not putting forth the effort?
The fact that kids are stressed out about failing a grade is because they will be left behind.
I failed the third grade, and it made me a better student. However, today when I speak to people about being held back in the third grade, I’m looked at as weird or what is wrong with you; the third grade is easy.
Some things come easy to some people, and others don’t have to try. I was one of those kids who had to struggle in school.
If I failed, I knew I would get another chance to try, but I would be behind my peers.
Yet, that’s one of the key points in fear of failure; how will I look if I fail. What will my peers, family, and friends say about me?
That’s a lot of pressure for kids to succeed.
What if I don’t make the team (e.g., football, basketball, cheer-leading squad, etc.).
Nevertheless, this mindset of not being afraid to fail transfers to being scared to make decisions. Because of the fear of the outcome. Will I pass, or will I fail?
It’s the outcome-based mindset that drives most people to fail.
The outcome-based mindset says setting goals and measuring progress gives us the desired effect rather than the actions it took to get those effects.
Basically, focus on the process, not the outcome.
I would argue that kids (people in general) should be focused on the process. The process of practice, learning, and developing and honing new skills until it becomes engrained in your mind.
Yet again, failure doesn’t exist; the only thing you did was produce a result. If you quit, that’s another story. The results will always tell the story.
Effort is between you and you! Only you can judge effort.
Therefore, don’t worry about failing in school, life, and in whatever, if you don’t get the desired outcome.
Instead, follow the process, and you will succeed in school, life and in whatever you put your mind too.
Whether you passed or failed (producing a result) only time will tell when you have mastered the process.